@ 7:32 AM

I now almost disinterest in everything, except my dear. Drained from what happened. Tired of explanation and understanding.

Juz came back this morning. Have been staying wif dear during the weekends. Always leave Cam alone at home, feel bad, hope she understand. Now sleeping on the next bed.

My relationship wif ppl ard me, gg downhill..at least it wad i feel. wif my mom, esp. I cant care more. I wrong, obviously. maybe ppl juz take it plainly tt there is no difference between u are wrong, and u are wrong and u noe it. nvm. im tired of being nagged at to the point of tempting to cut all my contact. im struggling here. and she jus nag. as if im nt enuf of it. as if it will give me some practical solution of wad im struggling wif. i dun tell her, its my fault. maybe i juz never try hard enuf. to me, mum is never someone u can share things wif w.o the fear of being misunderstood, or fear ur story being distorted. dunno. wadever. i always have this wanting, wanting my parents to be listening ears and my retreat when im tired and need a shield. well, i guess i sound selfish, bt wad i mean is, my parents as my frens who i can share things wif. bt my tings always get leak out as her daily gossips. rubbish. im so tired of ppl who i dunnoe, noe abt my stuff. tat definitely rubbish.

she always think i dun understand, and i need reminder. why act generous if u cant afford it? why act generous if only to nag at the person at ur mercy later on? save ur generousity and ur money and ur breath, will it be better for both? always try to give me the best? and the best nag too yeah? tired. of explanation. of her unstopped nag. always so poison wif her mouth. however kind u are at heart, ur word can destroy every seed of kindness. words can kill. and it do kill. hurt. she hurt too, yeah? see her child shout back at her from thousands of kilometer. after all her kindness. after all her "give u the best".

broke down badly ystd. if u are nt wif me, tings will turn worse. thanks dear. u are the only thing and everything i have now. i pin my future wif u. dun shatter my hope.

@ 7:32 AM

I now almost disinterest in everything, except my dear. Drained from what happened. Tired of explanation and understanding.

Juz came back this morning. Have been staying wif dear during the weekends. Always leave Cam alone at home, feel bad, hope she understand. Now sleeping on the next bed.

My relationship wif ppl ard me, gg downhill..at least it wad i feel. wif my mom, esp. I cant care more. I wrong, obviously. maybe ppl juz take it plainly tt there is no difference between u are wrong, and u are wrong and u noe it. nvm. im tired of being nagged at to the point of tempting to cut all my contact. im struggling here. and she jus nag. as if im nt enuf of it. as if it will give me some practical solution of wad im struggling wif. i dun tell her, its my fault. maybe i juz never try hard enuf. to me, mum is never someone u can share things wif w.o the fear of being misunderstood, or fear ur story being distorted. dunno. wadever. i always have this wanting, wanting my parents to be listening ears and my retreat when im tired and need a shield. well, i guess i sound selfish, bt wad i mean is, my parents as my frens who i can share things wif. bt my tings always get leak out as her daily gossips. rubbish. im so tired of ppl who i dunnoe, noe abt my stuff. tat definitely rubbish.

she always think i dun understand, and i need reminder. why act generous if u cant afford it? why act generous if only to nag at the person at ur mercy later on? save ur generousity and ur money and ur breath, will it be better for both? always try to give me the best? and the best nag too yeah? tired. of explanation. of her unstopped nag. always so poison wif her mouth. however kind u are at heart, ur word can destroy every seed of kindness. words can kill. and it do kill. hurt. she hurt too, yeah? see her child shout back at her from thousands of kilometer. after all her kindness. after all her "give u the best".

broke down badly ystd. if u are nt wif me, tings will turn worse. thanks dear. u are the only thing and everything i have now. i pin my future wif u. dun shatter my hope.